训练17,概要写作示例与写作训练07- 2022年新高考英语读后续写&概要写作能力提升训练
练 概要写作示例与写作训练 7 【写作示例】
【原文呈现】
阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇 60 词左右的内容概要。
Dear daughter，
As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.
You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model.
College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you: "Education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten." What I mean by that is the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about – this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn"t critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.
Do your best in classes, but don"t let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don"t graduate with honors. So please don"t give yourself pressure. During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don"t be worried. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either. Love,
Dad (& Mom)
【思维路径】
[ 核心内容]
本文是李开复写给即将上大学的女儿的信中的节选部分，全文共分四段。第一段主要讲写信的背景和目的。第二段描写了她是个很好的姐姐及她与妹妹的关系。第三段是李开复给女儿关于大学的第一条建议，即他认为大学学习的真正意义是从被动学习转向自主学习的阶段，会使个人转变成一个很好的自学者。第四段是他给女儿的第二条建议，他以女儿两个不同阶段的表现来建议女儿不要给自己太大的压力，不用太在意成绩，而是应该侧重与个人的努力程度。
[ 写作 思路] （ （1 ）理清文章脉络、概括段落大意。理清文章脉络、概括段落大意是写摘要的基础，同学们可以通过找主题句、分析段落的逻辑关系来梳理文章的脉络，概括大意。该文第一段内容简单，主要介绍了地点及写信原因，因此没有明显的主题句；第二段是介绍人物关系，主题句为第一句话，”You have been an excellent elder sister”。第三段的第一句话强调了大学的重要性，但是主题句需要自己稍微总结一下，应为 what learning in college is about is the ability to analyze a new problem。第四段的主题句则比较明显，为该段第一句话，”Do your best in classes, but don"t let pressure get to you.” （ （2 ）确定表达要点、灵活准确表达。因本文是一封信，所以要把本文的题材类型首先表达出来。其次，每段的段落大意都是我们要表达的要点，这可以确保不漏点。在确定表达要点后要思考如何准确灵活表达，这是难点。因为评分标准要求完全使用自己的语言。灵活表达的重要技巧是对原来的语言进行同义替换（paraphrase），同时要对相关内容进行整合。第一第二段内容不多，可适当表达出要点即可。本文重点在于第三第四段。每段都可归纳一个要点。第三段要点为强调大学学习的主动性，要侧重能力的培养，故在概括的时候可用到该段的部分关键字，如”ability”,”self-learner”,”skills of learning”。第四段要点为不要给自己太大压力，要轻松的学习，不要太在乎成绩。同样也利用巧妙使用关键字的方法来进行概括。句子不能与原文一样，但是我们可以用含有关键字的其他句子来表达。而这段的关键字则为”pressure”,”try”,”happy”等。
[ 参考范文]
This is a letter a father wrote to the daughter who will enter college soon （要点1）. In the letter, father praised daughter as an excellent sister（要点 2）. Besides, he emphasized the importance of college and encourage the daughter to cultivate the ability of self-learning（要点 3）.What‟s more, he persuaded the daughter not to put too much pressure on herself（要点 4），instead, happiness is much more important than the grade.(66words) [ 范文解析]
范文中主要包含四个要点，分别为每个段落的要点。要点 1 中介绍了题材和两位主人公。因要点 2 与要点 3，4 关联不大，所以把它与要点 1 用 in the letter 连接在一起,使文章看上去更连贯一些。因要点 3 开始是另外一方面的内容，故可理解为转向另一个话题，用 besides来进行过渡，并且要点 3 中有两个小点，这两个小点就可以用 and 简单连接一下，清晰明了。要点 4 与要点 3 是并列关系，故用 what"s more 来承接第二条建议。范文中最后一句话也是要点 4 的一部分，与前一句话是转折关系，故用 instead 来导出。综上，范文包含了所有要点，意思全面但又不累赘，措辞简单易懂，结构上也比较清晰。
[ 提炼归纳]
1. 语义转换 语义转换是新题型概要写作中很重要的一项基本技能，因为评价标准对“使用自己的语言进行观点的独立表达”有较高的要求。本范文中我们将”become a self-learner”改写成”the ability of self-learning”,意思一样，但却从不同角度着手，避免了重复运用原文句子的情况。再例如范文中第四段中心句”don"t let pressure get to you”,该句已完全表达了第四段的重要内容，如何用另外的句子表达相同的意思是此类作文题的难点之一，我们可以通过改变主语的方式来进行转换，如”persuaded the daughter not to put too much pressure on herself”。
2. 巧用句型 巧用句型不仅是原有作文题型中要求的一项提分技能，更是新题型概要写作中的一项增分且实用的技能。将字数较多的原文缩写成 60 字左右的概要，一个重要的技巧就是学会运用各种学过的句型，尤其是从句的使用。从句能将原来的两个句子的意思表达在一个句子内，
意思不变但是字数明显减少。如范文中的第一句“This is a letter a father wrote to the daughter who will enter college soon”，该句为定语从句，整个句子表达了两个意思，一为这是父亲写给女儿的信，二为这个女儿将要上大学了。多使用不同句型的句子不仅能减少字数的使用，而且能使整个文章更加精致和有内容。
【写作演练】
1.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇 60 词左右的内容概要。
Why do some people live to be older than others? You know the standard explanations: keeping a moderate diet, engaging in regular exercise, etc. But what effect does your personality have on your longevity? Do some kinds of personalities lead to longer lives? A new study in the Journal of the American Geriatrics Society looked at this question by examining the personality characteristics of 246 children of people who had lived to be at least 100. The study shows that those living the longest are more outgoing, more active and less neurotic ( 神经质的 ) than other people. Long-living women are also more likely to be sympathetic and cooperative than women with a normal life span. These findings are in agreement with what you would expect from the evolutionary theory: those who like to make friends and
help others can gather enough resources to make it through tough times. Interestingly, however, other characteristics that you might consider advantageous had no impact on whether study participants were likely to live longer. Those who were more self-disciplined, for instance, were no more likely to live to be very old. Also, being open to new ideas had no relationship to long life, which might explain all those bad-tempered old people who are fixed in their ways. Whether you can successfully change your personality as an adult is the subject of a longstanding psychological debate. But the new paper suggests that if you want long life, you should strive to be as outgoing as possible. Unfortunately, another recent study shows that your mother‟s personality may also help
determine your longevity. That study looked at nearly 28,000 Norwegian mothers and found that those moms who were more anxious, depressed and angry were more likely to feed their kids unhealthy diets. Patterns of childhood eating can be hard to break when we‟re adults, which may mean that kids of depressed moms end up dying younger. Personality isn‟t destiny, and everyone knows that individuals can learn to change. But both studies show that long life isn‟t just a matter of your physical health but of your mental health. _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________2.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇 60 词左右的内容概要。
Being a high school student is probably one of the hardest things in the world. From the countless classes to the endless homework, your school may seem stressful some days. So, it‟s understandable if you feel under pressure sometimes.
However, by making a few changes, your high school life could become easier. First, as starters, try to build a better relationship with the most important people in your life: your parents. “To succeed, teens need love, acceptance and support from their parents,” psychologist Sara Villanueva wrote on Psychology Today website. With this in mind, try to explain your difficulties to your parents. That way, they‟ll understand you better. To do this, simply talk to your parents and share your feelings with them and they may be able to help you. Having a good relationship with your teachers is important too. If you‟re finding a certain class too hard, talk to your teachers and ask them for help. It‟s teachers‟ job to make sure their students understand what they teach, so they‟ll be more than happy to help you.
And then, you also should start by helping yourself to become more successful at anything you do. To start with, set yourself some realistic goals, like “I‟ll improve my math grade by next semester,” or “I‟ll join one more after-school club.” And rather than just tell yourself these goals, plan them out carefully－and stick to them. You can get yourself a calendar, and mark every piece of school work you have on there, for example. That way, you can see exactly what you need to do
and when you need to finish it by.
Another thing to remember, however, is that relaxation is just as important as working hard. “It is good to take time to relax during heavy periods of work to stay energized (精力充沛的) and focused,” US student Anna Pohoryles wrote on university website Odyssey. So, if things get too difficult, taking a break may be the best solution of all. _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 3.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇 60 词左右的内容概要。
Eighty-five percent of the jobs that today"s students will do in 2030 don"t exist yet,the Institute for the Future has predicted.That might seem like a high number to reach in only 10 years.But think about the non-mainstream careers that did not exist just a handful of years ago: social media manager,app developer and cloud computing engineer,etc.What role should colleges and universities play in preparing students for a workplace that is constantly changing? Educational institutions are trying to answer that question."We hope they will not only be prepared for whatever the job market looks like in 10,20 or 50 years but be the ones shaping it," said Jenn Stringer,professor at the University of Californian,Berkeley.Here are some of the approaches they"re taking. Some experts argue that the four-year learning model needs to be rethought in a big way. They say education can no longer be seen as something that stops when a person graduates from college.If students could take a year or two off school,get a job,and then return to school a few years later,the education system would offer true life-long learning and better adapt to changing technology. Fewer employers are willing to train people on the job than the employers 50 years ago, largely as part of an effort to cut costs.To fill the job skills gap,some courses are offered as an add-on to a student"s main degree.For example,the courses may include data analysis,web design and digital marketing.The goal is to offer students,a degree aside,some advantages when they seek
jobs or promotions in the future.
Other institutions are trying to imitate the workplace within the traditional classroom. Several colleges have partnered with private companies,such as the software company Adobe, to integrate their products into the classroom.Professors at schools who partner with the company are encouraged to use the product for assignments.The idea is that students learn how to create a project that can be used in the real world and the"soft skills"such as teamwork and creativity. _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 4.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇 60 词左右的内容概要。
Cultures can be different from each other in many aspects. People can eat different foods and live in different types of houses. People probably speak different languages and have beliefs and customs very different from yours. However, they can be similar in ways of connecting with each other. We sometimes call these means of communication universal languages. Some legends hold that (据说) thousands of years ago there was a single language spoken by everyone. It is fun to think about a time when everyone may have been able to communicate in the same language though historical evidence does not support this, of course. Today, there are thousands of languages spoken around the world. Yet, there are some means of communication that go beyond words and allow people of wildly different backgrounds to communicate and share emotions and feelings. For example, some people believe music is a universal language. There may be some scientific support for this idea, too. Experts have learned that across cultures people can recognize three common emotions in music: happiness, sadness and fear. Another universal language that you might not have thought of is math! If you think about it now, it just makes sense. The value of “pi” is roughly 3.14159 no matter where you are. Similarly, we judge the value of something by the same mathematical calculations, no matter whether you‟re
counting in dollars, pounds or RMB. _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 5.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇 60 词左右的内容概要。
In today‟s world where we have various translation apps that allow us to talk to almost anyone “in his own language”, why do we still need to make an effort to learn a foreign language ourselves? There are practical reasons, of course. For example, those who are bilingual (具备双语能力的)
have a better chance in the job market. And science has proved that learning to speak more than one language can train one‟s brain to be stronger. But there‟s more to it than that. US author Rita Mae Brown once wrote: “Language is the road map of a culture.” By taking a look at the vocabulary and idioms of a language system, we get a glimpse (一瞥) at what‟s held important in a certain culture. Take the Swedish word “lagom” for example. It means “just the right amount”, which doesn‟t have a matching word either in English or in Chinese. From “lagom”, we can see how much the concepts of “moderation (适度)” and “balance” are valued in Swedish culture. By learning a foreign language, you also gain a better understanding of your own culture. Irish language expert Benny Lewis explained this idea in his blog with an interesting metaphor: “Trying to understand your own culture merely from within it is like trying to understand what a bus is like if you‟ve only ever ridden inside it. If you want the bigger picture, you need to get off that bus and examine it from the outside.” And by opening our eyes to different cultures, we‟re able to understand better how people grow up to be different from one another. We also learn to be more tolerant and respectful to the diversity of the world. As Trinity University professor Leonardo De Valoes wrote on the school‟s website: “Foreign language study is simply part of a very basic liberal education: to „educate‟ is to lead out, to lead out of narrowness and darkness.” _______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 答案与解析 1.【参考范文】
Two recent studies have researched the relationship between personality characteristics and longevity. More outgoing, more active and less anxious people and sympathetic and cooperative females live longer, for these personalities may bring them more social resources. However, seemingly advantageous personalities like self-discipline and open-mindedness do not necessarily lead to longevity. Surprisingly, a mother‟s personality may affect her children‟s life span. 【解析】
本文为一篇说明文的概要写作。文章讲述了性格和寿命之间的关系，更外向、更活跃、更不焦虑的人以及富有同情心和合作精神的女性寿命更长，因为这些性格可能会给她们带来更多的社会资源。然而，表面上有利的性格，如自律和开放的心态，并不一定会导致长寿。令人惊讶的是，母亲的性格可能会影响孩子的寿命。注意词数要求和使用自己的语言。
写之前，需要认真仔细地读几遍原文材料，让理解更深刻，抓住几大要点去写题。本篇概要写作，需从以下几个要点着手； 要点 1：该段最近有研究探讨了人性格特征与寿命的关系，主题句为 A new study in the Journal of the American Geriatrics Society looked at this question by examining the personality characteristics of 246 children of people who had lived to be at least 100.
要点 2：该段主要讲述更外向、更活跃、更不焦虑的人以及富有同情心和合作精神的女性寿命更长，因为这些性格可能会给她们带来更多的社会资源。内容可以从 Long-living women are also more likely to be sympathetic and cooperative than women with a normal life span 中提炼。
要点 3：该段主要讲述表面上有利的性格，如自律和开放的心态，并不一定会导致长寿，内容可以从 Those who were more self-disciplined, for instance, were no more likely to live to be
very old.及后面句子中提炼。
要点 4：该段主要讲述母亲的性格可能会影响孩子的寿命，主题句为 another recent study shows that your mother‟s personality may also help determine your longevity. 【范文点评】
审题时要认真分析每段要点，不能 遗漏要点。答题时要注意准确地使用了相应的语法结构和词汇来改 写要点句，并有效地使用了合适的衔接词使上下文意思连贯，文章结构紧凑清晰。
2.【参考范文】
As a high school student, you may feel stressed sometimes. (要点 1) To get rid of pressure, you can first communicate with you parents, sharing feelings with them. (要点 2) And your teachers‟ help is also very important especially when you are stressed in study. (要点 3) Besides, you should try to become a successful student by setting suitable goals and carrying them out. (要点 4) At last, try to relax when necessary. (要点 5) (65words) 【解析】）
这是一篇概要写作。
写作步骤 1）细读原文。首先要仔细阅读短文，掌握文章主旨。文章主要说明了作为一名高中生，你有时会感到压力。为了摆脱压力，你可以首先与你的父母沟通，与他们分享感受。老师的帮助也很重要，尤其是当你在学习上有压力的时候。此外，你应该努力成为一个成功的学生，设定合适的目标，并实施他们。最后，在必要的时候尽量放松。
2）弄清结构，归纳段意。概要写作是写全文概要，不是写某一部分的概要，或者就某些问题写出要点。因此一定要弄清文章结构，归纳文章各段大意。
3）列出原文要点。分析原文的内容和结构，将内容分项扼要表述并注意在结构上的顺序。在此基础上选出与文章主题密切相关的部分。
3.【参考范文】
To help students better suit and reshape the ever-shifting work landscape, colleges are taking various measures. (要点 1) Firstly, life-long and adaptive learning model is expected to replace the present 4-year one. (要点 2) Besides, additional training programs beneficial to acquiring practical job skills are provided for college students. (要点 3) Moreover, some colleges cooperate with enterprises to make classrooms more like workplaces and enhance students‟ all round capabilities. (要点 4) 【解析】
这是一篇概要写作。
第1步:根据文章内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。文章第一段用提问的方式引出主题：大学在帮助学生们适应不断变化的职场起到什么角色？所以本文的内容概要是为了帮助学生更好适应职场，大学采取了各种各样的措施。要点 1 要先写出文章目的。要点 2 第二段讲到第一点措施offer true life-long learning and better adapt to changing technology.终身和适应型学习模式预计会替换现在 4 年教育。要点 3 在第三段 some courses are offered as an add-on to a student"s main degree.有益于获得工作技能的格外的培训项目被提供给大学生。要点 4.在最后一段：大学和公司合作把课堂营造成职场并加强学生全面能力。
第 2 步:根据写作要求,确定关键词(组) , 如: beneficial to 有益的； are provided for 被提供 Moreover 而且, some colleges cooperate with 合作；enhance students‟ all round capabilities增强全面的技能. 等。
第 3 步:根据提示及关键词(组)进行遣词造句,注意主谓一致和时态问题。
第 4 步:连句成文,注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡，书写一定要规范清晰，保持整洁美观的卷面是非常重要的。
【范文点评】
本文内容完整,语言规范,语篇连贯,词数适当。作者在范文中使用了较多高级表达方式,如 To help students better suit and reshape the ever-shifting work landscape, 和 Moreover, some colleges cooperate with enterprises to make classrooms more like workplaces and enhance
students‟ all round capabilities.中都出现非谓语动词的运用，全文中没有中国式英语的句式,显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外, 文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然,为文章增色添彩。
4.【参考范文 1】
Although there exist some differences in people‟s diets, housing, languages, beliefs and customs globally, people can still communicate with each other in universal languages.(要点 1) It‟s even interesting to think that people used to speak the same language in the ancient world. (要点 2) Music is believed to be a universal language that can make people share common emotions.(要点 3) The same is also true for math, because the value of something remains unchanged (fixed) wherever you are and whichever way you are calculating.(要点 4) 【参考范文 2】
Though cultures may be different in diets, housing, languages and beliefs, people can communicate with each other through universal languages. (要点 1) It is said that people used to speak only one language but there are no convincing facts of it. (要点 2)However, music is considered a universal language as it conveys the basic feelings like happiness, sadness and fear. (要点 3) Maths is another universal language because people value things with the same criteria no matter what measurements they use. (要点 4) 【参考范文 3】
Though cultures may be different in many ways, people can communicate with each other through universal languages. (要点 1)It is said that people used to speak only one language but there are no convincing facts of it. (要点 2)Music is considered a universal language because people can find some common feelings in it. (要点 3) Maths is also a universal language since some mathematical calculations are fixed among people. (要点 4) 【参考范文 4】
Although cultures vary/ differ worldwide in food, living, languages and beliefs, they shares similarities in what we called universal languages. (要点一)Interestingly, legendary beliefs claim
that a single language was spoken in ancient times, which lacks convincing facts.（要点二）Nowadays,some forms of languages can be recognized universally. For instance, people enjoy a mutual understanding of music regardless of their backgrounds. （要点三）Math is another example because the same calculation methods can be adopted to judge the value wherever we are.(要点四）
【解析】
本篇书面表达是概要写作，要求概括文章内容，通读全文可知，本文主要讲述虽然人们在饮食，住宿，语言和信仰等很多方面有所不同，但是人们可以使用通用语言进行沟通，文章还列举了两种通用语言。注意篇幅控制在 60 词左右。
5.【参考范文】
Why should we master a foreign language despite diverse translation apps? (要 1) It brings us some practical benefits. However, its value is more than that.（要点 2）Language is an important aspect of culture. Foreign language study helps us understand further the cultures abroad and at home. Thus, we can learn to accept human uniqueness and respect the diversity of the world.（要点 3）
【解析】
这是一篇概要写作。
本篇书面表达是概要写作。要求概括尽管，现在有不同种类的翻译软件，但是我们还要掌握一门外语的原因。从三个方面进行分析，第一：
外语带给我们一些实际的好处。但是它的价值也不只如此。第二：语言是文化的一个重要方面。外语的学习帮助我们对国内外文化有更深一步的了解。第三：我们能够学会接受人类的独特性，并且尊重世界的多样性。写作过程中，注意词数在 60 词左右，同时使用自己的语言，不要照抄原文语句。写作之前要认真阅读原材料，加深理解。遵循原文的逻辑顺序，对重要的主题、标题、细节进行概括，全面清晰的表明原文信息。尽量使用自己的语言，不要照抄原文原句，篇幅控制在 60 词左右。